I'm pretty satisfied with my progress in spotting the difference between male and female structures. I think the next round is going to focus on the ladies.–KLK
If you're looking for service with a smile, you won't get it from Maddy! Service with a snarl is this little tart's specialty. Have an inquiry about an item? Prepare yourself to experience what parents go through when they try to ask their teenage daughter a question. Don't think for a second she'll admit to not knowing something and refer you to someone who may. Without missing a beat, Madeline will assure you that even the owner himself couldn't answer your question. President Barack Obama may have given the thumbs up about this establishment, but don't count on getting the presidential treatment when our sour sweetheart is at your service. Did you feel like you were a stupid person before you decided to get a pastry? Well you do now! All thanks to Miss December, whose award of this honor kicks off the upcoming year of Philly's Most Awful Employee of the Month! 


Before my current set up, I used to live with another pretty blonde lady... Miss Andrea. As usual, my rendition fails to do her justice. She's so much better looking in real life, but I still think the illustration is worthwhile.
Andrea and I lived together for two years, in two crummy situations. (Literally, there were crumbs everywhere.) In either location, we'd always hide in her locked room like little kids, shushing each other and struggling to hold back giggles when we'd hear the front door slam. I remember we'd often escape for walks through the upscale family neighborhoods of Philadelphia, which have the best tree-lined streets with the most exquisite architecture. We'd make our way to the Schuylkill River trail, where we'd watch the sun cast explosions of color as it set over the pollution riddled horizon.
I recently did two portraits... one of of my roommate, and one of myself. I used colored pencil for the majority of the work and added additional coloring and adjustments in Photoshop.

Be careful if you find yourself walking through a park on Halloween at midnight! You might run into the fabled Mutant Olsens. Deformed by a freak microwave accident that resulted in the fusing of two sisters as toddlers, (and their subsequent replacement on the show Full House by robots courtesy of Mr. and Mrs. Olsen), the creature roams the earth on Halloween looking for Bob Saget. You may not be Bob Saget, but that doesn't mean you're safe! The Mutant Olsens use their freaky vacant four-eyed stare to psychically paralyze anyone who crosses their path... then the beast feasts with both mouths on their victims' brains! Bwah ha ha ha ha!





Just like every superhero needs a sidekick, every 6 foot fashionista needs a little dog. They simply go together, and have since the modern revival of a trend that goes back to Victorian and Elizabethan times, when the most posh upper class ladies were always accompanied by their small dogs. I'd say my roommate is pretty posh. Though I'm not sure I'd consider us upper class, we rent in a fancy shmancy neighborhood, and I do believe my lady looks better than a large percentage of the wealthy wives on our block.
One of my jobs is at the front desk of a local business, which is located in a high-rise building that is otherwise closed on Sundays. Our business is the only one there that day. One Sunday, when I was all by myself at work, a leak started in our lobby. Over the course of an hour, another leak sprang up, then another, and another, until there was water pouring from every imaginable crevice. Huge pimples of water began growing beneath the thick layer of latex paint on the walls... right next to my desk, and right above the power strips for the stereo, telephone, credit card machine, computer, and printer. It turned out a pipe three floors up had burst. Some Eastern European guys came in to fix it. I suspect they acquired very excellent plumber skills on Russian spy submarine. Needless to say, it was somewhat of a challenge to tend to the tasks I needed to tackle that day, but I did, and managed to crank a little cartoon out as well.
Lewis is a mysterious creature disguised as a four pound miniature Pomeranian. This four year old fluff is my roommate Vanessa's side-kick, and the source of that little scritch-scratch-scritch-scratch you might hear rushing across my apartment floor. But when you hear him, I challenge you to try and find him. He's nowhere to be seen. Maybe he's off in one of his hiding places, or perhaps on some The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe-esque adventure.



My main prerogative, honestly, was to just draw a hot girl and enjoy coloring her face. So I picked the hottest girl I know (/the girl who looks most like me), my number one lady Dawn. I haven't drawn her since high school, when I was a hack, so I figured it's about time I pay some homage.










The Perfect Wife: the concept that plagues modern women across the first world. The Ideal Woman is a notion that has been present throughout the history of mankind, or womankind if you prefer (you feminist). The Ideal Woman is an opinion, comprised of the collected and averaged opinions of the masses, on the matter of what a woman should be like. She is a figment, an invention. She is a goddess to men (or so women think) and a nemesis to women (refer to the prior). It evolves throughout time and varies by region. However impermanent the specifics of the standard may be, the one thing that has been consistent is its influence on the culture in which it exists. Once a woman enters domestic bliss and all the joys (chores) that come with it, the Ideal Woman takes on a whole new challenge of becoming The Perfect Wife.This past Christmas, I had the idea that I'd like to decorate my hair up like a Christmas tree. I came up with a plan to adhere a styrofoam cone to a head band, then cover it with tracks of hair extensions. I would then clip in some lightweight dollar store ornaments, and a paper star. I even acquired some battery operated multi-colored rice lights, and planned on hollowing out a space on the cone for the 4-AA battery pack.
This was my sketch:
I never got around to doing it, however, due to all the holiday madness. But there is always next year, and hopefully by summer, I'd like to explore some of my costumery ideas. Dressing up has always been a big part of my life. I've been doing it since I was as young as three, taking every opportunity as a reason to really play. My costumes ranged from Elvira with socks for boobs for a random day in October when I was 5, to one of the observers with a blue rag in a bowl for watching Mystery Science Theater 3000 when I was 7. Maybe it's because I took dance and theater. Maybe it's something that's just in me. I haven't really gotten to enjoy this sort of entertainment recently, save the one time sophomore year of college when my housemates walked in the front door to find me cooking corn in a homemade Indian feather headband. I was very happy this past October that a political rally was held the day before Halloween, which justified my ridiculous enthusiasm as Sweet Sarah P.
Costumery and play is something that's brought me a lot of happiness and laughs with the people around me in my life. I'm hoping that with that in me, I can pursue a side project and potentially make some fun and interesting things. But I don't think I'll ever be a larper.